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How Going Abroad Taught Me About Life – Everyday Leadership

Contributed by Janet Ong

Here are the stories from my exchange experience that surprised me in the end. This is my experience with AIESEC NCTU in Hsinchu City, Taiwan as part of the the project Connect the World from September to December 2013.

This cultural exchange program was designed for us exchange participants to make an impact on high school students by sharing things about and from our countries.

Surprisingly, this exchange program taught me a lot about life. I was approached by one of the teachers in one of the high schools I was teaching at. The teacher knew I intended to go to law school because of how I had introduced myself in her class. She wanted to ask me for more details on law school because she was very worried about her daughter, who was on the verge of giving up law school.

I told her that I wanted to specialize in criminal law and in the field of human rights because I wanted to be a court lawyer and be of service to people. She asked me how I already knew which specific field in law I wanted to pursue this early on. I simply told her that I always remind myself of why I wanted to be in this field to begin with. I remind myself that I am doing this not only for the sake of my career but also for the sake of the people who are in need of help and that I think being a court lawyer best fits this interest.

The exchange program is more than the learning you get from the four corners of the classroom, it is the learning from an experience in life.

She asked me this question so that she could help her daughter who was about to graduate but was attempting to give up. Surprisingly, she really wanted advice from me. I told her to tell her daughter to remind herself why she chose law and to remind herself of the positive things that happened in law school despite the difficulty she was currently having. The teacher said that her daughter was worried about the bar exam. In response, I told her that everyone was scared of the bar exam and even I was afraid of it. I told her that working hard for a dream would achieve good results.

What was the surprise here? After saying those things to the teacher, I  saw myself as the daughter who was worried about law school. Then I reflected on those words I said to the teacher. It made me realize that I can manage as long as I believe in myself. Friends and even former professors have been telling me that I can manage, that I have good academic standing and a keen interest in the classes in my undergraduate course in psychology. I get positive feedback from my classes. What is there to be afraid of? I am afraid of failing, but who isn’t? I am afraid of falling, but who isn’t? Everyone is. It is a matter of facing your fears.

Everyone thinks, I lack the courage to face them; I do not believe in myself; I do not trust myself. If I believed in myself, I would have the capacity to say I can do it. Then I realized, am I not like her daughter too? Afraid? I gave advice that the teacher appreciated and believed that it would be of help to her daughter. I realized, I can do it. I can pursue my dreams despite the struggles; believe despite the hardships.

I got letters and messages from my students, teachers and friends telling me I am a funny and jolly person. They said I have this motivation and energy that influences other people. It has always been a surprise for me to see in the letters or even hear this feedback because I do not see myself like that. I believe that I gained more confidence and courage from this project than anyone could ever imagine. I remember the poster/ad of AIESEC DLSU saying, “Get lost and find yourself”. I am indeed discovering a lot about myself from feedback from other people.

I realized now that we need other people who are courageous enough to tell us about ourselves. Feedback from other people no matter how minor can help us realize what is really happening in our lives. This is why I have to say that I am very glad that I met the people I did, experienced the things I experienced. If not for those, I would not have found myself. I would not have discovered something more about myself. I would not have been the way I am right now. I may have had a tough rocky road along the way but everyone does, right?

I believe that things happen for a reason. Now, I believe that these things had to happen to open my eyes and see the reality. I am grateful for the good and bad. If not for the bad, how could I have appreciated the good so much? Right now, I just do not know the right words to express how much AIESEC, my fellow trainees, teachers, students and friends have helped shape my life for the better. It is quite sad for me to leave because this is the place where I learned a lot, not about academics, but about life itself. It is a place where I found good friends. However, I have to say goodbye, face the things that I have to face back home and continue on with my life. People come and go in our lives but it does not mean that they will be gone from our lives. The people I met will always be treasured dearly. Everyone may be far away from one another but distance is not a barrier to maintain the friendships that we have created.

The world has still a lot to offer. The world still has a lot of surprises. There is still a lot more to learn from. Just smile at the world, and it will surely smile back at you. But this experience is one of the best I have ever had. This is my second home—Taiwan. This has been my Wonderland.

I am happy that I was here. I am happy that I was able to convince students who did not participate to participate. I was able to convince students who did not smile, to smile. I was able to see how keen and eager the students were whenever I was presenting. I am happy that I was able to see how the students’ eyes brightened. I am happy that I was able to see and hear the students laugh, joke and even be loud for a good cause. These were the actual experiences I had with my last class: the most difficult but the best class I ever had.

My last class was supposed to be the most unresponsive and I was told that the class does not really answer questions. However, it was different when I was there. They were welcoming and happy. My last class is where I can say I was really able to Connect the World and fulfill the goals of the project. This was the class where I can say that I really was able to make a difference. These are irreplaceable moments in my life that can make me say and realize that, “Hey! I did make a change”. It may have just lasted for a day, an hour, a minute or even just a second, but the little things showed me that one person could really make a big difference.

This is the teaching experience.
This is the experience of life.
This is the AIESEC experience.
Thank you very much.

After the exchange experience, where am I now? I had the courage to take up law school and continue my AIESEC journey. I am currently a first year student of law and a member of the Finance and Legal Affairs Department of AIESEC DLSU. What am I grateful for? I am grateful that AIESEC shaped my life and happy that I was able to contribute to AIESEC’s vision of “Peace and Fulfillment of Humankind’s potential”

Here’s a tribute for my AIESEC experience:

“The exchange program is more than the learning you get from the four corners of the classroom, it is a life experience. It is about finding who you are and learning more about yourself throughout the journey. I began to open up locked chests that I didn’t know existed within me. Moreover, I’ve realized how life is so wonderful and it never fails to give you those little things that make you smile.
It’s also about never giving up and never losing hope.

It was also in this exchange program that I found what I am passionate and dedicated about — and AIESEC is one of those things. AIESEC taught me how to stand up for myself and be a leader — a leader who will be able to make a wonderful and positive impact in my country and also in the world.

Lastly, it is indeed an honor and a privilege to be part of AIESEC. I will forever and always be thankful for AIESEC.”

“This story was written in contribution to the AIESEC Everyday Leader Series, that showcases stories of everyday leaders who are changing the world. Share your story with the world.

13 Ways to Focus on Yourself in 2014

It’s always very easy to get caught up with the many things and responsibilities you have to cater to. We are so hard bent on getting lost in the complexities that everything seems like such a hurdle. It causes stress on you and the people around you, straining relationships and testing tempers.

It’s not too late to set a resolution, so we’d like to remind you of a few simple things to be more effective and efficient in your everyday life. A new year is a chance to start again, a chance to change and improve, a chance to be better. Let’s make the best of it!

1. You’re Responsible For You.

Everyone has bad days. Everyone has things that don’t go their way. It’s okay to be upset. But don’t let that hold you back or keep you from getting back up. We all get knocked down so that we can stand up again.  Challenges are always going to punch you in the face, so fight back! No one is going to do it for you.

2. Listen To Your Gut

Life is a maze. We reach crossroads. We may not have the answers. It is natural to seek advice and guidance. But always remember, each person has a different opinion and a different perspective. Each experience is different. That feeing in the pit of your stomach that won’t go away? Listen to it. Sometimes it’s okay to trust your instinct. You’d be surprised at how accurate it can turn out to be

3. Listening Is Just As Important

Communication is a two-way street. If you want to be heard then you need to be able to extend the same courtesy to another. Being able to hear and listen are two different things. Everyone is just as important as you are. Everyone wants to be heard and understood. Be the kind of person that lets people know their voice is valued.

4. Be An Encourager

Remember the last time you wanted to try something and felt insecure about going ahead with it? Every other person in the world feels that way. Insecurity is a part of our life but the right words go a long way in easing that insecurity. Being someone who pushes people forward goes a long way. You may have just played a part in giving someone the courage to go after their dream.

5. All Bark And No Bite!

Nobody likes a person who just talks and talks and does nothing. Actions always speak louder than words. Be known as someone who gets things done, who’s word is as good as the job being done. Always remember that ‘Well done’ is better that ‘ Well said’.

6. When In Doubt, Just Ask.

You’re not expected to know everything. Every day is a learning experience. Some may know more than you. There is no shame in asking because you don’t know. It shows your willingness to learn and better yourself.

7. Learn To Laugh At Yourself.

Okay, so you spilled a glass of water on yourself in front of a bunch of people. So what? They’re laughing at you? Laugh with them. It’d be pretty funny to see someone else with a soaked shirt right? Sure, it might be a little embarrassing, but that is where great stories come from. Besides, being laughed at can’t embarrass you if you’re laughing along with them too!

8. Politeness And Kindness Go A Long Way.

The world is moving at such a fast rate, that we forget to acknowledge the people we see. Take a moment to wish someone a good morning. Smile. Mum said don’t talk to strangers, she never said don’t smile. You could just make someone’s day. Kindness goes a long way too. No one’s asking you to go out of your way to help everyone, but if there is something you can do for someone, do it with a smile. Who knows when you might need them to give you a hand?

9. Give Something New A Try.

‘Get out of your comfort zone!’. I’m more than sure that you’ve heard this plenty of times! And that is because it’s true! This world is huge and offers more things than you could dream of! Take full advantage of that! You’re not going to gain anything by sticking to the same boring old routine day in and day out right? Talk to a stranger on the bus, try a new dish, colour your hair! Countless new things to try! Who knows, you may find something you’d like to make a part of your life!

10. Don’t Retaliate In Anger

Anger is such a powerful emotion. The urge to strike back and inflict the same hurt you feel is enormous when you’re upset. Many a times we say or do things in the heat of the moment and almost always end up regretting it. Simple tip: When you’re mad and you question whether you want to say or do something, DON’T do it. You’re guaranteed to regret it. You can be as mad as you like but keep calm and wait till you’re feeling less agitated and then take up whatever issue you may have. Give yourself that time and space. It’s okay to want that and communicate the same to the people around you.

11. Always Keep The Bigger Picture In Mind.

Life is too short to hold on to trivial matters. In a few years what seemed like a big deal today will be nothing more than a passing thought. Don’t let a petty matter affect your work, health or relationship with people. It is just.not.worth.it. Holding a grudge takes up too much effort and time. Focus that energy somewhere more productive. There is more to come, more for you, more for the people around you. Remember that.

12. You’re Your Priority Too!

The relationship you have with you is as important as the relationship you have with anyone else, maybe even more important. Because you have to live with you every single day for the rest of your life. Take time off to spend with just you. Catch up on a movie , read a book or treat yourself to a spa day. Ensuring you are happy and at peace with you is the only way you will be able to focus on growing in your other relationships.

13. Every Little Thing Counts!

Every day has something new to offer, there will always be something new to learn. You just need to look for it. It can be anything, from learning a new word to a piece of advice.  No action, no matter how small, is insignificant. So appreciate and look at what you can gain out of an everyday experience. A few years from now, when you look back, you’ll see that it was all the little things that made the biggest difference in creating your picture.

 

AIESEC provides over 100,000 young people with the chance to improve their skills each year. If you are looking to volunteer with AIESEC, check out our website at www.aiesec.org